“The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock.” Matthew 7:25
I’m not here to encourage you today. Or at least not to encourage by telling you how great it’s going to be when things finally work out. This is something that makes me cringe more than anything.
Going through a hard time is like having your vulnerability on display for everyone to point to and judge. Opinions fly from every angle and it weighs the heart down.
You hear terrible things like, “If you just had faith, you’d walk in your healing.” Though they do not realize how much faith it takes to get through even one moment of your life. Or, “You’re probably not married because you need to be healed first.” Because, society forbid that you have ANY ounce of happiness in a struggle you have literally zero control over. This also cements the ever present lie that you are both not enough and too much all at the same time. Or, one I hear almost every time is, “You must have demon!” I’ve heard thousands of variations of these things (and many more) over the years. Each time, it chips away at me. Though I try to hide it, I don’t do a very good job.
It’s like you become more distant from people. You never truly want people to see your struggle because you KNOW they’re going to share their ignorant opinion about the weightiest things in your life.
I really hope I’m not alone in this. I hate sharing about my struggle partly because of the judgement and opinions, partly because it’s so personal but also because I am NOT a victim to the struggle.
God has given me the ability to do everything I need to do. Where I have a deficit, he brings community. It’s the most beautiful thing.
So, why am I sharing this? I don’t really know! I hope someone out there can relate.
Maybe you’re in the middle of the winds and rain beating against the house. Maybe you’re hearing a thousand cringe-y things from well meaning (but completely obnoxious #sorrynotsorry) people and you literally just want to give up. But you don’t. You haven’t given up hope. You still hold on even though everything inside of you and outside of you seems to be telling you you might as well.
There have been so many times where I’ve said to myself, you could give up right now and no one would judge you! In fact, they probably would recommend it. But we do NOT give up. I gave it to God and got ‘it’ done.
Maybe you can relate. Maybe you’re really struggling financially, or relationally, or physically, or mentally or all of the above… But you’re not giving up and you are not going to fall.
God gives us courage when we need it most and hope when we see it least.
I’m always nervous to share things like this because I KNOW, again, that judgement is going to come from people. I KNOW that people are going to voice their ignorant opinions and do so loudly… I get it. It happens.
But maybe you’re reading this and you’re going through something really hard, maybe a lot of really hard things, and you need to know you’re not alone. You need to know it’s ok that things aren’t ok and it’s not a sign that you have a demon or you’re just ‘not ready’. You are showing that the impossible CAN and WILL happen. You are showing that bravery comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes and that those butt heads (I had a different word, but my friend told me it wasn’t family friendly, haha) and their opinions don’t matter. You are showing that God is stronger than any deficit in life and he can bring something SO beautiful from the MIDST (not just the outcome) of ANY struggle.
There’s so much going on in people’s lives we don’t see. Don’t assume anything. Remember, it’s easy to judge and tear people down, but it’s beautiful to see light and build someone up. We all need it.
If you’re toughing it out, you’re incredible. Your struggle isn’t going unnoticed and I have no idea how much longer it will be before you see the light peak through the clouds. You don’t need to hear it’s coming, because it didn’t come today and today is all we have, right?! But do know that you are stronger than anyone could possibly know and God is with you in this moment. He’s not angry, he’s proud. He’s proud of you for being strong in the midst of great weakness, for clinging to him when anybody else would’ve given up. For giving it to him and putting on a brave face.
So, the rains may come. The storm may come. But you will not fall.